faiLURE (free verse)

Monument of success

you stand aloof

taunting me to stay away

like a recurrent dream

remembered at the very scene

where I cut you off

yet again and again replay…..

If I could discard this iron chain–

this failure

and, like its’ name

LURE it into a sulfurous pit

my mind’s disquiet would regress

and I would seek what I now avoid.

No more would failure’s distress

LURE ME into a vacuous void

full of sighs and one word….QUIT

I am very upset with myself.  I have had intense anxiety since my dad died and have allowed it to stop me from trying something new.  I feel like a failure for allowing it to control my life.  I need to take control back.  I need confidence that life will be ok without him.  I need to let go of my fears and embrace trying something new with a feeling of anticipation and not dread.

Picture: fotado.pl

Under the Brim (Tanka)

Bright dappled sunlight
A flash of silver streaks by
My eyes dart around
Snorkeling under the brim
A moment of Sheer Wonder

‹∞›

For mindlovesmisery prompt: Sheer Wonder

I love snorkeling. It is one of the few activities where I lose all sense of time and place. I forget even who I am, mindlessly following the fish and watching the sun dance under the surface.  I wish I could participate more than once or twice a year.  Perhaps that is what makes the experience such a constant source of wonder for me.

Tanka: 5/7/5/7/7 syllabic haiku

Picture: etsy.com

Scarred Breast (Fibonacci)

Scars…
Seems…
Raised ridges.
Smooth pink colored ropes,
a picture frame around my breast.
Rounded smooth flesh protrudes from neat embroidered stitches
like a bra with an underwire tucked tight and smooth. Soft transplanted flesh fills out the whole.

«ð»

 

I am often asked to describe what my transplanted breast looks like.  This is one attempt in Fibonacci form.  It is my unwanted reality.

Written for Prompt 39 An Unwanted Reality by mindlovemisery

Fibonacci: a poem with syllabic lines of 0 or 1, 1, 2, 3, 5, 8, 13, 21 and so on.  The prior two lines make the syllabic number for the following line.  Most poets stop at 13 syllables. 

Alopecia (Senryu)

Hair floats down like snow

Im a tree losing my leaves

Hibernation time

• ≈ •

I appear to be losing hair.  I brush and loads of it flits down to the ground.  I run my fingers through it and a handful is caught in my fingers.  Distressing!  Having once lost my hair to chemotherapy, I feel that once was enough.  I think the stress of my dad’s death has caught up with me.

deviantart.com

Senryu: similar to Haiku in form but while Haiku has themes related to nature the Senryu highlights feelings and relationships

Broken (Cinquain)

Breathless,
rapid breathing,
like hummingbirds in flight,
fruitless effort to exchange gas…..
Broken

My dad survived esophageal cancer for eight years.  Unfortunately, while the radiation treatments may have helped cure the cancer, the radiation killed him by creating a condition called secondary pulmonary fibrosis.  The radiation scarred his lungs and gradually grew more short of breath until he couldn’t live without a ventilator in the end.  I am a little angry over that.  If cancer doesn’t kill you, the treatments eventually will.  My dad, toward the end when we knew his lungs were very bad, told us that he was “broken”.  I will never say the word broken the same way again.  My dad never let anything defeat him, and to admit that he was broken just breaks me down.

Cinquain: A Cinquain is written using a pattern. This type of poem only has five lines.

Line 1: 2 syllables Line 2: 4 syllables Line 3: 6 syllables Line 4: 8 syllables Line 5: 2 syllables

 

Joy and Grief (Etheree)

Grief;
Sadness
bubbles up,
superheated,
from woe-striken pools
as thought melts away vile
tinged thoughts, leaving smeltered gold.
Mournful regrets give thoughts unsaid
impact as synaptic scars adhese.
Life-long memories, caged and cataloged.

Love layers grief with burnished retention
as burdensome thought is replaced with
helium delight. Memory,
sorted with rose-washed glass,
recalls ardent yearning;
irritation lost,
reflection now
the greatest
comfort;
Joy

Etheree: Consists of 10 lines of 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10 syllables. Etheree can also be reversed and written 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1.  Often used to contrast opposite ideas.